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Fun with Strangers (Dollar Tree edition).

twins May 19, 2013 1 Comment

Another day, another uncomfortable encounter with a stranger.

The place: Dollar Tree checkout line.
The offending stranger: A crotchety old lady. (Who else?)

We stood in line, our little family of 4, waiting for the cashier to scan our goods. Mike handled the transaction, while I stood beside him with the girls. They sat facing away from the rest of the line, not making a peep. Another successful outing with twins.

All of a sudden, I hear a loud, sarcastic “GOOD LUCK!”. I pretend not to notice, until the words are echoed once more. “GOOD LUCK”.

I hesitantly turn around to confront the source of this unwanted commentary on my family. It’s a short, gray-haired woman nodding towards the stroller. “Good luck!”.

I laughed it off and turned back around. Partly because I didn’t want to talk to the lady, and partly because I felt like I had food in my teeth and didn’t want anyone to see.

She didn’t take the hint. “Boys or girls?”, she asked.

I’m not sure why she didn’t consider the possibility of there being one of each, but whatever. That’s a crotchety old lady for ya. “Girls”, I told her.

The words that came out of her mouth next made me want to spit whatever was stuck in my teeth right into her wrinkly old face.

“Ohhh… That’s even worse. Girls are bitches.”

Say whaaaaat? Did she just refer to my sweet little babies as BITCHES? Really?

Again, I laughed it off and turned around. I didn’t want to talk to her before, and I sure as hell didn’t want to after that.

I stood there, disgusted and uncomfortable, praying for the damn cashier to speed it up.

The lady kept yammering on, while I tried my best to tune her out. She said that she hoped I wasn’t offended and I stupidly told her I wasn’t. But really, what would be the point of saying that I was? We’d be out of the store in a matter of minutes, never to see the ignorant hag again.

And eventually we were. Back outside, and onto the next store… Cautiously on the lookout for the next nut-job hellbent on giving us their unsolicited opinions of our ~~bitches~~ children.

Bitches, they are not.

“Yo mamma so stupid it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes”

twins May 12, 2013 Comments: 3

Mike drew this for me for Mother’s Day. (Missing faces are kind of his thing.) Creepy, but sweet.

It’s Mother’s Day. And for the first time, it’s my day.

Although I’ve held the title for more than 9 months now, it still seems so hard to believe sometimes. That I’m a mom. A mother. I have children. All of those “Yo mamma” jokes are about me now.

As I’ve mentioned before, growing up I was always so terrified of having kids. I had never been a “baby person”. I just didn’t see the appeal. Everything babies did made me gag. All that drooling, spitting up, pooping… No thanks. I didn’t want any part of it.

Yet here I am. A mother — of twins no less — and enjoying the hell out of it.

Sure, there are days that really test my patience. Days where I wish I could just stay in bed and let the girls fend for themselves. Hell, I don’t exactly love getting spit up on. Or changing poop-filled diapers. Or getting sneezed on by someone with a mouth full of pureed peas (totally happened the other day). Yet despite the unpleasant messes it brings, motherhood has been an amazing experience so far.

Looking at those little faces and knowing that I made them… That they came from my body and here they are now… these little people, laughing and playing. It’s beyond incredible.

I feel so lucky to have been given this gift of motherhood. As sappy as that sounds, I truly mean it from the bottom of my heart. It really is a gift, and I hope that I always embrace it — split pea sneezes and all.

Vines & boxes.

twins May 8, 2013 1 Comment

I finally got around to putting together the “Late April” edition of “2 weeks in 2 minutes”. Better late than never, no? Hopefully I don’t lose interest in making them anytime soon. I love that I can include so many little glimpses of our days in one cute little video. They’re long enough to get an idea of what we were up to, yet short enough that it doesn’t feel like I’m watching old Aunt Ida’s Florida vacation slides.

The next couple of weeks are going to be exciting for me, mail-wise. (Yes, I consider good mail days “exciting”… That’s my life, folks.) I have 4 subscription boxes coming my way. Woo! I’ll be getting my May Conscious Box, my first Citrus Lane box (got the 1st month for half off), my first Daily Dose of Green box (got 3 months for the price of 2), and the May Stork Stack box (won a free month for 4th place in their “Cutest Baby” contest!).

I’ll post the box reveals/reviews as they arrive. I love reading box reviews on other blogs, so it only makes sense that I write my own too. Well, as long as I can afford to get some boxes. I have no clue how people can afford multiple subscriptions… shizz can get expensive! (Thank you, promo codes!)

Alright, enough box babble… Here’s the late April video (made with Vine, as always):

Note: This post contained a few affiliate links. Click away!

Digital photography, how I love you…

twins May 3, 2013 Comments: 2

NINE MONTHS!

This time I’m gonna skip the “oh my god they’ve grown so faaaast” junk & just get right to the photos. Cos there’s lots of ‘em. (I may have taken 259. So yeah. Lots.)

There’s a fan up there, and it is VERY interesting.

The fan is no longer interesting.

“Um, you are NOT pointing your butt at me, Chloe…”

“Raaaaawwwrrrr!”

Chloe is really pushing it…

Someone is NOT in a pleasant mood…

“I think Chloe needs a timeout, mom.”

…

“Uh… Why are we on the timeout chair TOGETHER?”

“I don’t even BELONG here… Chloe was the bad one… This is crap…”

“Get OFF me Chloe…”

“I need a nap. Being your sister is exhausting.”

I’ll stop myself here. I assure you, there are a LOT more I could post… but I’ll spare you the other 200+ photos. That would make for one mighty long blog post (and many, many unfollowers).

It’s never too early to decide on a career…

twins May 1, 2013 Comments: 4

I suppose I should be embarrassed (ashamed?) to admit this, but… My babies are addicted to judge shows. And commercials. Especially commercials featuring attorneys. Coincidence?

Sure, I put kid-friendly shows on Netflix for them too. Well, mostly Yo Gabba Gabba (tell me those songs aren’t catchy!). But nothing holds their attention more than a thrilling episode of Judge Joe Brown or an obnoxious commercial for local personal injury attorneys.

I think it all goes back to the womb. When I was pregnant last summer, I was stuck on bed rest and spent my days sprawled out on the couch watching daytime TV. Being that we don’t have cable, daytime TV = non-stop judge shows. Judge Mathis, Judge Alex, Judge Judy, Judge Marilyn Milian, that divorce court judge, and good ol’ Judge Joe Brown. I guess it’s only natural that they feel a connection to them now. Um… right?

Anyway, I thought it would be fun to make them their own little attorney ads to get them ready for their inevitable future careers. (Too soon?)

Hopefully the statute of limitations will have run out on this by the time they turn 18... Don't sue me, girls!

Hopefully the statute of limitations will have run out on this before they turn 18.

If you’ve watched any judge shows, you KNOW this shit happens ALL THE TIME. I don’t get it.

Chloe is shocked that someone would punch you in the nose. She will FIGHT to get you the results that you deserve! (Ev is kinda confused by the whole thing.)

I doubt someone would sue over a stolen hose, but hey, it rhymes with “Rose”.

Swings are… fun?

twins April 29, 2013 1 Comment

We took the girls to the park yesterday with one goal in mind: Some good old fashioned springtime swing time! Weee!

I LOVED swings when I was little (hell, I still do today), so I was looking forward to seeing the pure joy on the girls’ faces as we pushed them through the air for the very first time. The giggles of delight as they excitedly swung higher and higher…

Soooo you can imagine my disappointment when things ended up looking more like… well, this:

Weeeee?

“Why am I in a rubber bucket with leg holes?”

“Mom, this thing smells like other babies’ butts…”

“So… Is this supposed to be fun or something? I… don’t get it.”

“Hey Chloe! Does yours smell like other babies’ butts too?”

Ah, babies.

My new addiction / Conscious Box “Mystery Box” Review April 2013

Subscription Boxes April 20, 2013 Comments: 8

Confession: I’m addicted to subscription boxes. Like, unhealthily so.

What’s a subscription box, you ask? Welp, basically it’s a box that you receive in the mail (usually monthly) that’s chock full o’ goodies. They can range from $10/month to $50+, depending on the company/products offered. Some will tell you what will be in the boxes before they ship, but most don’t (which is the fun part!). Nothing beats a good mystery box… Well, unless it totally sucks. haha

There’s a TON of companies doing this now, so you’re bound to find something that tickles your fancy. I’ve seen boxes for moms/babies (Citrus Lane, Bluum, Stork Stack), for nerds (Loot Crate, Booty Bin), makeup lovers (Birchbox, Beauty Army, Pop Sugar), for pets (Barkbox, Pawalla), foodies (Love with Food, NatureBox), etc, etc… Subscriptionboxes.com is a good resource to browse a lot of the more popular boxes out there. A good tip is to Google reviews of the boxes that you’re interested, to see what past boxes contained and whether or not it seems like a good match/value for you.

The only box that I currently subscribe to is Conscious Box. (I’m hoping to add to my addiction soon!) It’s currently a top-rated box on Subscriptionboxes.com and is $20/month, including shipping. They offer eco-friendly products, including household cleaners, healthy snacks, eco-conscious gadgets, baby products, etc. Each box contains 10-20 samples/full sized products. There are 3 different box options: Classic, Gluten-Free, and Vegan (yay!).

The last couple of boxes from them have been a little… underwhelming. However, they recently offered a “Mystery Box” that they promised to be jam-packed with goodies. So I crossed my fingers and ordered one. It arrived today, and holy guacamole, is it AWESOME!

The Mystery Box, in all its glory.

As promised, the box was PACKED with awesomeness. When I caught a glimpse of the macaroons, I knew that ordering this was a brilliant call on my part. Go me.

Holy mother of macaroons! These are AMAZING.

I might as well start with these babies, since they’re most definitely the highlight of my box. I’ve gotten them in a previous month and absolutely fell in love. Vegan, raw, chocolately macaroons that melt in your mouth. Need I say more?

mmm… clusters.

I’ve also received these in a previous box. Light, crunchy *natural* fruit snack. “Apple Crunch” was decent, but the berry-flavored ones were a lot more interesting (better).

Aw, nuts.

Almonds & soy nuts. It looks like the Soy Nut Mix is vegan, but the almond one has honey in it. Boo. Oh – the Mystery Box couldn’t be customized, so some non-vegan items were included, but I’m okay with it. Most of the things I got were vegan anyway. Woo!

Brownies n’ coffee.

Microwaveable brownies! Sadly, they have honey in them, but they look tasty. The chocolate coffee looks pretty fantastic though!

Ooooh… decadent!

This looks very promising. AND it’s clearly labeled vegan. I’m down for anything chocolate. Or cocao nib-y.

What? I can’t eat these?

And finally, the non-food stuff… Green laundry detergent that promises to “get rid of built up minerals and leftover detergent” and a lid that converts a regular mason jar into a travel mug. The detergent I’ll most definitely use, but the lid thing… eh, no. I don’t have any mason/canning jars laying around, so… Really no use for it.

So that’s my haul. Considering I used a discount code and only spent $10 on this box, I’d say that I made out pretty damn well!

If you’d like to check out Conscious Box for yourself, please use my referral link below. Happy box-ing!

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Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links. Click away!

A little bit of happy.

Uncategorized April 19, 2013 Comments: 2

I started drafting a “real” post, but in light of all the crummy things going on in the world right now, I thought I’d just share a couple of uplifting videos instead. (And I might be experiencing a bit of writer’s block too, but let’s keep that on the down-low.)

First, the much talked about national anthem from the Sabres/Bruins game in Boston the other night. I wouldn’t say that I’m a very patriotic person, but this most definitely brought tears to my eyes. If you haven’t seen it yet, check it out. If you already have, it’s worth seeing again.

Next, the 5th installment of “2 weeks in 2 minutes” (early April edition). Cute babies make people happy, yes? It also features a couple embarrassing photos of Mikes as a young nerdling. Guaranteed chuckles at his expense!

And last, but certainly not least… the great Mitch Hedberg. I discovered him in the mid-90′s and still kick myself for not seeing him when he came to Buffalo in 2005, the same year that he died. (Crap, this is supposed to be uplifting…ugh.) Just watch it!

We’re gonna need a bigger photo album…

twins April 6, 2013 Leave a comment

The girls’ nursery doesn’t get too much use during the daytime, which is sad since it’s such a cozy little room. So a few days ago, as we were getting the girls ready for their baths, I decided to do a quick photo shoot in there. The lighting was perfect, so I thought the shots would be awesome. And they probably would have been… if I had bothered to adjust my camera’s white balance setting from “incandescent” to “sunlight”. Whoops. My bad, yo.

Luckily, with a little help from Picasa, I adjusted the color enough to make the photos look “warmer”. They still look kinda “off”, but I actually kinda like the end result.

Okay, enough babble… Enjoy “Pre-Bath Fun with the Rosebuds”…

“Wait, hold up mom…”

“My ear is stuck under this bow thing…”

“Can you move it? …What? …No?!”

“BWAHAHA Mom said no! Sucks to be you, Chloe!”

“Can you maybe try a different angle? Or crop my ear out?”

Go take some shots of Ev now, mom…

“Huh? My turn?”

“Look mom! I’m a birdie!!”

“Now I’m a… um… slug.”

Alright, we’re done mom… just bathe us already.

Why is 6 afraid of 7?*

twins April 4, 2013 1 Comment

8 months!

Yesterday the girls turned 8 months old.

In-sane.

How did this even happen? Where did my teeny little babies go?! Ahhhh!!

In keeping with tradition, I took their monthly “sit on the couch/lay down with letter magnets” photos yesterday afternoon. But I also took some shots of them in their nursery, pre-bath. Both sets produced a few keepers, so in true “proud mamma” fashion, I’m going to share both of them. However, I won’t totally bombard my poor readers with a gazillion baby photos at once. (You’re welcome.) I’ll save the nursery photos for another post.

Soooo here’s the “usual” (boring?) shots: