March 2017 Bitchy Box unboxing time!
If you haven’t heard, Bitchy Box is a new subscription box that delivers goods to help “brighten any woman’s darkest week of the month”. Unlike most time of the month boxes that send you actual menstrual supplies, Bitchy Box takes a different approach by including FUN things that’ll make your period more bearable. You can expect to receive items such as sweet and/or salty treats, handmade beauty items, accessories, themed jewelry, and more. I should note that the website includes a disclaimer stating that this subscription box is not PC and if you’re offended by “dirty words” they might not be the subscription box for you. So this may not be the best choice to buy your pre-teen, but period vets (such as myself) who are able to curse freely will certainly enjoy it. 😉
Disclosure: I received this box for review purposes. I was not compensated in any way. All opinions are my own. Post may contain affiliate and/or referral links.
Subscriptions are $22/month with a 3-month plan, or less with longer commitments. Shipping within the US is free. (Shipping to Canada is available for an additional fee.)
Let’s see what’s in my March 2017 Bitchy Box!
The box! — It now ships with a paper wrapping over it, which both protects it and hides the not-so-subtle description on the side — “Angry Vajayjay Survival Kit” — from your nosy neighbors and/or curious mailman.
A peek inside!
An info booklet listed all of the items I’d find inside the March “Murder in My Pants” themed box. There was also recipes for “O+ Blood Punch” and “Redrum Bars”. 😉
Tucked into a brown paper “Evidence” bag were a package of Albanese Dark Chocolate Raspberry Jellies, which are just as the name suggests — chewy raspberry flavored jelly candies covered in smooth dark chocolate. Since they’re not vegan-friendly, I passed them along to my dad, proving that period boxes can (and should) be enjoyed by everyone.
Here’s another reminder that this box is definitely not intended for the PC/easily offended crowd. 😉 These “Crime Scene” panties feature police tape and a bloody mess on the front, with a “Blood Hound” cigar-smoking detective on the backside. A not-so-subtle way of letting your significant other know what’s going down down there? Ha.
A messy crime scene is gonna need some serious clean up… Bitchy Box included 30 of these individually wrapped “Down There” wipes to freshen things up a bit. The lavender-scented wipes are infused with a gentle formula that’s pH balanced, alcohol-free, paraben-free and hypoallergenic for your most sensitive areas. They’re also flushable!
I don’t see an obvious “Murder in my Pants” connection here, other than maybe needing a healthy dose of chocolatey goodness after losing so much blood? (A bit of a stretch there.) Anywhooo, these mini cookies are made with all natural ingredients and have a soft, brownie-like consistency. The company also makes a point to give back by helping to feed the hungry in their home base of Detroit.
I gotta say, I didn’t quite enjoy March’s Bitchy Box as much as the intro box I reviewed back in January, but it was still a… unique box to open. 😉 I think the quirky novelty items from the first box were what made that one so much more fun. Also, having two of the four items be non-vegan treats that I couldn’t personally enjoy was kind of a bummer. (Not that that would be an issue for probably 99.999% of their subscribers.) That said, the Crime Scene panties were definitely the highlight of the box this month. 🙂
What do the stars mean?
★ = Crummy ★★ = Just Okay ★★★ = Good ★★★★ = Awesome ★★★★★ = Extraordinarily Awesome